Total pages in book: 99
Estimated words: 94720 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 474(@200wpm)___ 379(@250wpm)___ 316(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 94720 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 474(@200wpm)___ 379(@250wpm)___ 316(@300wpm)
“What do you mean a mess?” she asked. “Is he angry?”
“I wish he were angry.” My voice came out a broken sob, despite my efforts to hold it back. “He’s sitting in his room, fucking crying, Rosie. Dominic crying.”
She said nothing.
“Hello?” I sniffed, wiping my nose with the back of my hand.
“I need to see him.”
“He said he couldn’t talk to you,” I whispered, hating that relaying that would undoubtedly hurt her.
“I don’t care. Where are you?”
“I don’t know. In the middle of nowhere, Florida,” I said, then panicked. “Is it safe to talk on the phone?”
“Yes,” she said. “I don’t care if you’re on Mars. I need to see him.”
“I wouldn’t even know how to tell you where to go.” I started crying again. “I don’t know where we are.”
“Can you put him on the phone?”
“He said he couldn’t talk to you,” I repeated, holding back a sob.
“Listen to me, Nora,” she said with an authority that made me fix my posture. “You’re going to walk up to him and hand him the phone right now.”
“Okay.” I stood up, nodding as I wiped my face as if she could see me.
I walked out of the bathroom and found Dom sitting in the same chair. His elbows were on his legs and his face was pressed into his hands. He wiped his face and looked at me. My hands were shaking out of control as I muted the phone.
“She’s really worried, Dom,” I whispered. “Like really worried. She wants to come over here, but I told her she can’t. I don’t even know where we are. She needs to talk to you and make sure you’re okay.”
He took the phone as I handed it to him. For a moment, he just stared at the screen. I held my breath, hoping he wouldn’t end the call. He took a breath, unmuted it, and set it against his ear. His defeated expression broke my fucking heart. I couldn’t bear it. I turned and headed to the door. Rosie would know what to say. As I was opening it, I heard him apologize to her over and over. I shut the door behind me and leaned against it, catching my breath and sniffling back tears. I wish I had it in me to ask more questions, but how could I, when it was so deeply ingrained in me that I should never question anyone in La Cosa Nostra?
I wasn’t even sure what would happen if I did. I’d lost track of how many grown men my father beat for asking a simple question. I loved these guys. They were my family, my home, and all I knew, but I was, but I was well aware that the way they treated me was not how they treated enemies. Whatever this was, it was big, and even though part of me wanted to know what happened, the smarter part of me wouldn’t let me ask past “Did someone die?” As I headed to my room, I passed Rocco’s and noticed his light was on, but I wouldn’t go there. There was no way I’d subject myself to his cold indifference again. I got into bed, brought my covers up to my chin, and crawled into the fetal position, wishing I could call my mom right now. I wasn’t sure how long I lay there, staring into the darkness before I fell asleep, but the sound of a door shutting jolted me awake. I turned over and sat up slowly as I watched Rocco emerge from our shared bathroom.
“Did something happen? Do I need to leave?” I asked, my voice hoarse from sleep, from crying.
He shook his head and stopped walking. The bathroom's light cast a sinister glow upon him, which should have terrified me. I didn’t move. He wasn’t close enough to touch, and I knew he put this distance between us for my benefit. Despite the space between us, I could practically feel him vibrating with something I couldn’t understand. It wasn't just lust; something else was here, something darker that he was holding back. On principle, I should have turned him away, but I knew I wouldn’t. My heart pounded hard. Fear and desire were so tightly entwined that I could barely distinguish one from the other. I knew bringing him to my bed and giving him the reins to unleash that darkness could be dangerous, but I wanted him. This, being with him like this, was the only thing in my life that I could control. Being with him was the only thing that gave me a bit of power and didn’t make me feel helpless. With a deep breath, I slowly lowered the covers and got out of bed, walking until our chests were almost touching.
He didn’t move, but I could feel how tense he was. His eyes were troubled, despondent. I lifted my hand and softly stroked his face, relishing the feel of his stubble grazing my skin. His body shuddered at my touch, and it took everything in me not to jump on him and wrap my legs around him. I knew he’d let me. I knew he’d do just about anything I asked him to do right now, and the only thing I wanted him to do was to let himself get lost in me. I dropped my hand and took both of his, pulling him toward my bed until he sat on the edge. I took my gaze from his to make sure the door was locked before I began to strip. It wasn’t a sensual strip tease. I didn’t even know if I was capable of that. I reached behind me and undid the knot of the bandana top, gathering it and tossing it aside. I unbuckled my shorts and let them slide down my legs, kicking them off. With my panties, I hesitated. Once I took them off, I’d be completely naked, and he was still wearing a black t-shirt and dark gray sweats.