Instalove Christmas Read Online Hope Ford

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Insta-Love, Romance Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 84295 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 421(@200wpm)___ 337(@250wpm)___ 281(@300wpm)
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“Well, I guess I’ll go in,” I tell him, again hoping that he’s going to say something.

When he doesn’t, I turn and walk slowly toward the house. As I get to the door, I turn and look at him one more time. He’s standing, leaning on the ax, not saying anything, just watching me.

I walk in the door, go to the guest bedroom, and slam the door before sliding to the floor. Sobs wrack through my body, but I have no choice but to let it all out. My hopes of there being something between us is gone now. He can barely look at me.

I stand up and go to pack my things. I wash my face to try to calm myself down. I have to leave now. I don’t have a choice.

Chapter 10

Gavin

“Where the fuck do you think you’re going?” I ask her as I come back into the house. She’s wheeling her suitcase through the living room, and I have to run to get between her and the front door.

She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath. “I’m leaving.”

She moves to walk around me, but I slide in front of her. I put my hands up, but she jerks herself away from me. “Please, Gavin. I’m barely holding on as it is. Don’t make it worse.”

I cross my hands over my chest. I want to pick her up and carry her to the bedroom and show her exactly why she can’t leave. But she looks like she’s about to start crying, and I have no experience with crying women. I hold my hands up. “Fine. You want to leave, I’ll let you leave. But give me five minutes. Please,” I beg of her.

She looks between the door and then back at me before she sniffles and finally nods her head.

I gesture to the couch and have her sit down. I sit beside her. “I’m sorry for last night. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

She juts her chin out. “You can be as sorry as you want to, Gavin. I don’t regret it. Not a second of it.”

I hang my head, remembering the way that I gripped on to her waist. I’m sure she has bruises. And the way I took her too many times, sometimes roughly. “Well, I do. If I could go back and do things differently, I would.”

She draws back from me, pain etched on her face. “Noted. Can I go now?”

“Dammit, Cassie, talk to me. I’m sorry for being too rough. I’m sorry if I hurt you.” I get off the couch and start to pace the room. “I wouldn’t hurt you for anything.”

I don’t know how long I pace back and forth before she gets up and stands in front of me. “What exactly do you regret, Gavin?”

“Fuck, where do I start?” I look into her hazel eyes, which are red-rimmed, and it guts me to know that I’m the one that made her cry. “I’m sorry that I hurt you. I knew you were sore, but I took you anyway. And now that you’re leaving me, I regret not holding you in my arms longer this morning.”

Her hands slide up my chest, and I gasp at the contact. “Why, Gavin? Why didn’t you stay in bed with me this morning?”

My head falls, and I rest it on her forehead. Filled with shame, I admit to her, “Because I wanted you again, and I couldn’t hold you without being inside you. I’m a fuckin’ soldier. I’m disciplined. But you’re an addiction, Cassie.”

I wrap my arms around the back of her neck, fighting the urge to kiss her.

She tilts her head to the side. “So you don’t regret sleeping with me?”

I am taken back. “Is that what you thought?”

She nods her head sadly.

“It’s not that. It was never that. I love you, Cassie. I think I always have. Every time we made love last night, I was hoping that I made you pregnant. I knew I couldn’t have you again, so I had to force myself to get out of bed this morning. I know I’m too old for you, and I’m a gruff bastard most of the time, but I want you in my life. I’d do anything to keep you.”

Cassie

“Anything?” I ask him.

He puts his lips to mine gently. “Anything.”

I run my hand across his cheek, my thumb across his lower lip. His breath is heavy and nostrils flared—there’s no denying that he does in fact still want me.

I take a step back, and he reluctantly lets me go. I start to undress, and with each piece of clothing I discard, I tell him, “I love you, too, Gavin Dawson. I don’t want to leave you. I’d give anything to stay here with you.”

“You can. I hope you will,” he says in a heartfelt tone.


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