Total pages in book: 124
Estimated words: 118459 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 592(@200wpm)___ 474(@250wpm)___ 395(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 118459 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 592(@200wpm)___ 474(@250wpm)___ 395(@300wpm)
“Hey.”
“I was just checking on you,” Olivia says. “I’m running to the grocery and wondered if you need anything.”
“Ever! We are going to get ice cream. Do you want to go?” Rory bounces up and down.
Ever dances around me. “Yes! Mommy, can I? Please?”
“Ever, why don’t you—”
“It’s fine, if she wants to go,” Olivia says. “It might do her some good to get out in the sunshine.”
“I don’t know.” I’m not thrilled at the idea of not being with her today. I want to tuck her against my side and breathe in every second with her. I want to remember every minute of this day and not waste a single moment with her.
“Mommy, please,” Everleigh begs. “I never get to see Rory. Please.”
“Let her go.” Crew’s voice is low, his eyes as quiet as his voice. “It’ll do you both some good.”
He exchanges a look with Olivia and I lean against the counter and sigh. I know it’s not right to deny her a fun day because I want to be selfish and keep her with me. She loves Rory and getting ice cream is a big deal for Ever. We don’t get to do that very often. Even so, I’m irritated that Crew feels the need to butt into the decision. But at the same time, it comforts me in a strange way.
“Okay, get your jacket,” I say with a tight smile.
Ever scampers to her room for her coat and is gone before I know it.
I’m left in the kitchen with Crew.
He stretches his long legs out and kicks one boot on top of the other. He looks at me like he doesn’t know what to say, so I do the honors.
“You don’t have to stay now. Ever’s gone.” I watch him uncertainly, waiting for him to move.
I expect him to. I want him to. But he doesn’t.
“How are ya, Jules?”
I feel my body sag with relief that he isn’t leaving. It’s an unconscious reaction, but one I don’t miss. “Okay.”
“Can I do anything?”
“Make her better . . .” My voice breaks on the last word and it’s like it hits him in the chest. His shoulders drop, the corners of his mouth sliding towards the floor.
He doesn’t say anything for a while, just stares at a spot on the wall. I gaze out the window wondering if I just grabbed Ever and took off, if I could outrun my problems.
“She goes in tomorrow, right?” he asks after a while, his voice raw. “Yeah. I have to take her up first thing in the morning.”
“Do you want me to come by and take you?”
“No. That’s nice of you to offer, but we’ll manage.”
“I don’t mind. I have sick days I can use.”
I snort. “That’s more than I have.”
“You don’t have any paid sick days?”
“No. I talked to Human Resources and explained that I don’t know what’s going to happen. If I miss three more days in the next month, they can fire me.”
His forehead pulls in and he tilts his head. I know he’s getting pissed, but there’s nothing he can do about this no matter how caveman he goes. “They did say,” I continued, “they won’t fire me. They’ll leave me on payroll so I have insurance and things, but I won’t get paid when I’m not there. I’m just gonna pick up extra shifts at Ficht’s, I guess. I don’t know. I just don’t know.”
I feel sick to my stomach. I don’t know how I’m going to swing all of this. I was barely making it before, but now . . . There’s so much coming at me that I’m dizzy. I just have to prioritize. Getting through this week with Everleigh and seeing what we’re facing, has to come first. I’ll figure out the rest later.
“You know all you have to do is ask me for help. Tell me what you need.”
I roll my eyes. “I’m not asking you to help me.”
“Why?”
“Really, Crew?”
“Yeah, fucking really. Why is it so damn wrong for you to ask me for help? Would you rather worry about every little fucking thing than take some help from me? Am I that bad?”
His face is twisted in a mixture of anger and hurt. He takes a step backwards, like he needs space between us. I see the cut on his knuckle again.
“What happened to your hand?”
“Nothing for you to worry about.”
“Fair enough.”
We watch each other, a million things being said between our gazes. I know he won’t say them out loud, just like I won’t. No need to taint the air with more venom. At least I can count on him for that.
“You don’t need a ride tomorrow?”
I shake my head. “No. We have to be there early, anyway.”
“Will ya at least call me and tell me what they say? It’s at Children’s, right?”