The Friend Zone Fiasco Read Online Crystal Kaswell

Categories Genre: Contemporary, Erotic, Romance Tags Authors:
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Total pages in book: 90
Estimated words: 92070 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 460(@200wpm)___ 368(@250wpm)___ 307(@300wpm)
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"Well, there was Spider-Man Number eight hundred sixty-six and then eight hundred sixty-seven, eight hundred sixty-eight, eight hundred sixty-nine. I fell way behind," he says. "They're into the nine hundreds now."

"And you read all of those?"

"I read eight."

"Doubled my numbers," I say.

"Yeah. Pretty embarrassing for a future public intellectual." He beams with pride.

It's flattering. But it's overwhelming too. I don't know if I can live up to Dare's idea of me as the smartest woman in the world. I'm smart, sure, but I'm not a genius or a visionary or an iconoclast. I'm just a girl who wants to find a way to marry brain science and movies. "I'll have to borrow your iPad and get up to date."

"You're going to read comic books?"

"When have I ever objected to comic books?"

He shoots me a really look. "When have you not?"

"Do they have to draw the women in such ridiculous poses?" I ask.

"Yeah. Someone put a gun to the artist's head."

"That would explain it."

"It is annoying," he agrees. "These dudes are professionals and they don't know basic anatomy."

"Are you trying to butter me up?" I ask.

He motions a little. "It's true though."

"And tattoo pinups?"

"You don't like this one all of a sudden?" He pushes his t-shirt up his shoulder to show off the pinup.

She looks kind of like me, actually. Dark, wavy hair, glasses (I wear contacts half the time now), curvy figure, wicked smile, and she's sitting on a stack of books.

If it was a film canister, I'd have ideas, but books are generic enough. I read a lot, but so do lots of women. Film is my thing. Our thing. Since the first weekend I met Dare, I've taken the time to show him my favorite movies, discover new favorites together.

"I'm still surprised you got that," I say.

"Why?"

"'Cause of your dad. And the magazines." I do love the tattoo—it's totally right for him, somehow, but it still surprises me. "You don't think it's similar?"

"No. She's sexual, yeah, but she's not a sex object." He taps her glasses. The book in her hands. "She's a character, with interests, a personality."

"She likes to read?" Is that an entire personality?

"'Cause hot girls don't like to read?"

"When have you dated a girl who likes to read?" I ask.

"We don't get that far into conversation."

"You don't notice bookshelves?" I ask.

He shoots me a where are you going with this look.

"I'm curious."

"Reading habits aren't a top factor," he says.

"What is?"

"Don't know. I'm on a break."

"Why?" I ask.

"'Cause I don't know. That's kind of fucked up."

"That you don't know what you want?"

He nods, like he doesn't really care one way or another, but the frustration in his dark eyes gives him away. "And I don't know if I want to keep going through the casual sex BS."

"The what?" I ask.

"Oh, Val, if you're about to enter the world of casual sex…" He shakes his head. "You have no idea how much BS. there is."

"Really?"

"Imagine a party where you only know one person."

"Okay." This is a pretty likely scenario. Well, a party where I only know one person well. Dare's friends love parties. I recall one of their apartments—I want to say Forest—and the loud rock-style music and the cheap liquor and the total inability to make conversation.

He waits until I find my vision, then he continues, "You're making small talk with someone who has an opinion you find ridiculous."

"Say, that Spider-man Comics are the height of literature?"

He smiles. "No, no, no. Worse."

"There's something worse?"

He nods. "Superman comics."

A laugh spills from my lips. Of course, Dare considers that worse. "Sure."

"But you don't want to tell them they're stupid, 'cause it's not worth it. And you know, if you try to argue The Avengers isn't the greatest movie of all time, you'll get stuck in a long conversation about Thor's hammer.”

"This is too horrible," I say.

"Oh yeah, it's awful. And they're going on about how much they adore Iron Man. And, more, about how smart the writing is, how MCU movies are cinema. And why would anyone care about cinema anyway? That's boring black-and-white shit."

Damn, he knows my weaknesses way too well.

"Only you're not at a party. You're in their room—"

"And there's an Avengers poster on the wall?" I offer.

"Of course." He nods. "And you're already taking your clothes off, and he's not wearing a shirt, and he's got a great body. Your body wants his body. But your head? You're not sure you can let someone so stupid touch you."

"This is common for you?"

"Not this scenario," he says.

"Don't tell me you secretly love The Avengers."

He laughs. "No way. They're a bunch of squares."

"So if it was Spider-man?"

"Who doesn't love Spider-man?"

That's true. I don't like action movies or comic book movies, and I still enjoy when Dare picks Spider-man movies. We take turns picking movies. But, of course, I protest a little. For effect.


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