Total pages in book: 139
Estimated words: 132437 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 662(@200wpm)___ 530(@250wpm)___ 441(@300wpm)
Estimated words: 132437 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 662(@200wpm)___ 530(@250wpm)___ 441(@300wpm)
He sucked in a breath
“Did I shock you?” she asked.
“No,” he said. “You spoke the truth I wanted to hear.”
* * *
Denne rubbed her thighs together as she pictured Allhan lying on some unfrilly bed, a couple of flat pillows under his head, some dark-colored bedspread wadding up under his restless legs. The lights would be dim or off altogether, and he’d have to be quiet because his roommates were next door—
Did he have roommates? Parents, maybe? Considering he was just out of his transition.
She’d never asked him if he lived with anybody, and she wasn’t going to. She couldn’t. Questions like that were reciprocal in nature, and she really didn’t want to stop this. Whatever was going on with him, whatever this was, she needed it right now, as she stared down the barrel of a loveless mating.
As soon as that ceremony with t’On happened, she was going to be faithful to the male she did not love and did not want. But she was not mated right now.
And these stolen moments with Al were going to have to last her a lifetime as she did her duty.
“Have you ever touched yourself?” she said in a throaty way.
“No.”
Her brows popped, and she heard the sound of screeching tires in her head. “Really? So this is your first time… ever.”
“Well, pretrans can’t get… you know.”
“You aren’t a pretrans anymore, though.”
“No, I’m not.”
Denne felt an uncoiling deep inside of herself. “Have I mentioned how glad I am you survived the change.”
And it was weird. Even though there was no future for them, she wanted to know absolutely everything about Al—well, except for the parts of his life that were going to be painful to hear about. Intended matings. Feedings that weren’t with her. Roommates who were not other males, but females who were unrelated to him, and beautiful, and available.
“Have you…”
“I’ve been on some dates,” she said, when his voice trailed off.
“But no one you’ve fallen in love with?”
“No, I’ve never been in love. And that’s not going to happen for me.”
With painful clarity, a bright light suddenly shone on the rest of her life, all the years ahead of her, the decades, the centuries. And the reality of her future with t’On leached the tingling heat from her, sure as if a drain had been opened in her heart and everything sexual she’d been anticipating just now had funneled out of her.
“Al, I’m not sure I should be your first… about anything.”
“It’s too late for that, Denne. You said it yourself.”
What the hell was she doing here. He should have this with someone who was going to stay in his life longer than a couple of nights.
“Tell me what to do,” he groaned. “Teach me what to do. Please.”
Biting her lower lip, she closed her eyes. For all the reasons she shouldn’t keep going, she knew she wasn’t going to be able to deny that pleading tone of his: She had the sense that he was as desperate to feel something good as she was. Even if she didn’t know his why, the sorrow and sadness in him were tangible.
And not just when he was staring across the river at that glass house or talking about his sister.
“Will you tell me what you want me to do?” he begged.
To get back into the mood, Denne returned to the hypothetical bedroom she had him in and once again imagined him lying down, one leg cocked out to the side, an enormous erection straining the fly of a pair of jeans like the ones he’d had on by the Hudson.
“Al, I want you to put your free hand on it—”
His throaty gasp was the sexiest thing she’d ever heard, and she pictured him arching back into those thin pillows he might or might not have owned.
“I want you to stroke your hard shaft over those blue jeans.” As he groaned again, her own body loosened, warmth pooling between her thighs, her breasts feeling heavy. “Are you going up and down on your cock?”
He let out a long hiss, and she knew that his fangs had descended out of his upper jaw.
“Does that feel good?”
“I can’t do it for long or I’m going to—”
“Oh, we wouldn’t want you to make a mess of your jeans.” She tsk-tsked. “Undo the top button, Allhan. But don’t put the phone down. I want to hear you when you tug on it.”
There was a series of grunts, and fuck her very much, but she suddenly had him in her room with her. He was on his knees between her legs, his hands working on the front of his jeans, undoing that button, unzipping things until the hard, blunt-headed length of him popped out.
“Oh, fuuuuck,” he moaned. “Now what.”
“Unzip them.”
Denne squeezed her thighs together again, and fantasized about him circling his shaft with his hand. “Grip your cock, Al. Do it now—”