Cluelessly Yours – It’s A Funny Story Read Online Max Monroe

Categories Genre: Alpha Male, Contemporary, Funny Tags Authors:

Total pages in book: 102
Estimated words: 97592 (not accurate)
Estimated Reading Time in minutes: 488(@200wpm)___ 390(@250wpm)___ 325(@300wpm)

The bad news? Getting hit by a cab can officially get crossed off my bucket list.

The worse news? While I’ve woken up from my coma, the man I’m in love with hasn’t stirred from his.

And the most terrible news of all? A pregnant woman is at his bedside, holding his hand, and saying that he’s the father of her baby.

Sammy Baker is a divorced, single mom trying to find her way again. With two boys and an absent ex-husband, she’s got the world on her shoulders and Legos under her feet.

Amid the chaos lives the dream of, one day, finding love again.

Though, she didn’t think that would land her smack-dab in the middle of two men.

Will Sammy choose the successful businessman who doesn’t hesitate to tell her he’s interested? Or will she go for the eligible bachelor doctor with a constant influx of women vying for his attention?

The smart choice and what the heart wants are two different things. And sometimes, fate has a way of making it so the choice isn’t ours at all.

*************FULL BOOK START HERE*************

To solo cups of Froot Loops and their fueling capacities.

To our crazy boys and their inspiration for all things “kid.”

And to those who loved Matthew Perry like we did, we have some words from Michael Scott for you… “Well, this is gonna hurt like a motherfucker.”

Cluelessly Yours is a full-length, action-packed romantic comedy stand-alone novel that’s chock-full of unexpected surprises that will consume you. (We’d like to say we’re sorry for the wild turns this book is going to take you on, but yeah, we’re not. LOL.)

As usual, this book is hilarious, but it’s also filled with the kind of excitement that will keep you on your toes.

As such, we suggest you heed the following warning:

Due to the hilarious and addictive nature of this book’s content, the following things are not recommended: reading in bed next to a sleeping spouse, reading on a first date, reading while you’re in the lobby of the doctor’s office, reading on your wedding day, reading during the birth of your child, reading at a family dinner, reading while eating and/or drinking, reading at work, reading this book to your boss, and/or reading while operating heavy machinery. It might seem like a long list of places not to read, but we assure you, if you do it in the right setting, it’ll be worth it.

Happy Reading!

All our love,

Max & Monroe

Tuesday, May 31st


“It’s been two days. When is she going to wake up? Is she going to wake up? I don’t—”

“Brooke, baby, take a breath. Don’t get yourself worked up.”

“Take a breath, Chase? How am I supposed to take a breath when my sister is—”

“Shh, baby. I know.”

I can hear my sister. And her fiancé. I want to go to them. I need to go to them. But murky water surrounds me. It mutes the light and feels thick like swampy sludge against my skin. I struggle against it, but my fight is futile, and I drift deeper and deeper beneath the surface, despite my sister’s crying.

“I know this is hard, but you have to give her time. Her body and her brain need to rest.”

“But for how long? I need to see her eyes. I can’t have this baby without her. I need… God, Chase, I need her.”

Soft sobs echo around me, and my head swims with a throbbing vibration.

“The impact she took was significant, and honestly, she’s lucky her injuries aren’t worse than they are. We have to be patient.” A third voice sounds familiar, but I can’t seem to place it right now. I can’t make sense of anything, really.

“But what about him?”

There’s a pause of some sort. It’s weighted, but my thoughts are too sloppy to understand why or how.

“As you know…his injuries are a little more severe. Now, we’re just watching and waiting.”

“Can’t you at least put them in a room together? I feel like they need to be in a room together.”

“Let me see what I can do.”

The voices fade. Time skips a beat and drifts to blackness. I don’t even see the water anymore. The world is a concept rather than a reality.

Roaring pain in my side seems like it should make me jump, but I can’t feel myself doing anything.

“You shouldn’t be here!”

“I need to be here.”

“Are you kidding? Look at my sister. Look at him!”

“Brooke, baby, let’s step out of the room for a minute, okay?”

Everything fades away, and I fall back into nothingness. It’s such a peaceful contrast to how I normally feel. And yet still, it doesn’t feel quite right.

Everything is…missing.

Beep-beep-beep drifts into my subconscious, and I fight the pull of fatigue as hard as I can. My brain feels fuzzy, and I can’t remember what day of the week it is.

Were the kids supposed to be dressed up as something today? Or wear a special color?

I have the most nagging feeling that I’ve already forgotten something, and I’m not even awake yet.

Ugh. It’s getting harder and harder to make mornings happen, but I’m a mom. I don’t have the option. It’s time to get up for work. Time to get the boys to school. Time to start the day.

But damn, I’m struggling to open my eyes.

Did I finally try to use that new lash serum I bought off Amazon months ago? Surely I did it wrong if I’ve lost the function of my eyelids.

It feels like ripping a stuck Band-Aid off a fresh scab, and my vision could easily be described as legally blind, but I’ve done it—I’ve forced the hard start and woken up. Everything is muddled and mashed together, and light forms glowing orbs that distort my surroundings.

I blink what feels like one thousand times to clear the warped fog so I can get my ass moving, only to find that I’m not in my bed…or my bedroom, for that matter.

I’m not anywhere that I recognize at all.